Burning
Music: ~ Your Love ~ Nicki Minaj
i'm really sick and fucked up. i have to be or else i wouldn't be missing him right about now.
i'm starting to feel this gnawing pain in my chest.
i want to call or text. but what would be the point. it'll just be another couple days of back and forth.
and the things i said is dialogue for a permanent breakup.
but right now if my eyes weren't so dry and tired i would cry.
there's this pain in my chest..
i want him.....but it's gonna be the same old shit over and over again......continuously.
great! now the headache is starting!.....that's when i know i'm really stressed and miserable....i get this whopping headache...and i'm really starting to feel it now.
god, i can't imagine hanging out with anyone but him now. i was getting tired of just spending time alone with him all the time.......but now i just want him.....he was mine...all mine....no-one else's.......everything of his was mine. his body, his mouth, his fingers, his voice, his everything......
I don't know if to scream, "oh God what have i done?!!!!" OR stay strong and not break down and call him.....cuz if i call him he'll prob not answer or fuck me up.
if i text it'll be the same thing. i don't want him to tell me anything mean, even thoughi really lambasted him tonight.
it's just that i couldn't take another silent treatment. really. i couldn't.
Tumultuous emotions just rolling around my head right now.
Be strong be strong be strong be strong be strong.............. why does everyone be happy except me.....why can't i put up with crap just like everyone else?
I'm burning for him right now.